Actually it’s a photo called The Mung Pie 3 by a photographer named Alison Brady, but fuck all of you and your lack of imagination.

Marinecorpselard went out for a walk
To find some hot bitches to suck his fat cock
Instead he got hit by some asshole in a truck
Who sped off away cuz he didn’t give a fuck

The moral of the story? Kill everyone that owns a truck, eventually we’ll get the bastard.

On a more serious note, as you can guess from the above work of quality poetry, our own Marinecorpselard did indeed get hit by some douchebag in a truck. Thankfully he’s ok. But he won’t be able to rock out and be metal for awhile, and for that we call for the driver’s head. We could probably turn it into a bong or something, y’know, for Lard to smoke his painkillers out of. We love you, dude! In a totally heterosexual sexual manly way.

Is your ass balmy or is it just me?

I have a confession to make. Sometimes I just come up with a topic and then see what random shit comes up in an image search.

Those damned sounds from the sky. We’re going to die.

You spilled your tree!

Yes, the chick's name is Suk Koch of SUK & KOCH Media (even better, the address is sukkoch.com!) HAW! HAW! …unless *gasp* it’s…intentional?